Lick twice for service


Long ago, before video games were capable of providing the consumer with 50+ hours of raw gameplay or five hours of cutscenes, developers had to seek other methods to ensure players were getting their money’s worth. While some games were likely more challenging due to hardware limitations than by conscious malice, there were a fair share of games back in the day that employed an arcade-esque difficulty strategy: by limiting the player’s ability to continue exactly where they left off, they would spend more time working their way back up to the area they died at, only for the cycle to inevitably begin again. Whether it’s due to years of experience or how games are designed nowadays, there are indeed many who feel video games have become lax, lacking in the adversity they once presented players in the “golden ages” of yore. Many years ago, however, one developer released a video game almost five years ago that changed everything, reminding the world that earning your keep can be its own reward sometimes.

Fortunately, this is not a review of From Software’s infamous 2011 action RPG or its recent 2016 follow-up. No, we’ll be looking at the second game from developer Kyrieru, the same man behind the merciless Kurovadis. This, my friends, is the story of Eroico.

This would be the “Ero” part of Eroico. Ico, sadly, is nowhere to be found. {.align-center}

Eroico was released on May 16th, 2013 and is the only other complete game Kyrieru has officially released thus far. Previously, the developer released Kurovadis on both DLSite and on Overture Interactive’s own website, whereas Eroico is only available through the latter means. Just as with the developer’s previous game, Eroico has no real semblance of a plot, though I feel it’s much less of an issue given how this game is structured. Eroico follows the adventure of a young knight who brandishes a sword, a shield, his crimson scarf, and ten thousand years’ worth of semen. On the knight’s adventure to do chivalrous things however he pleases, he’ll run into dreadful opposition in the form of seductive monster girls who just can’t keep their hormones in check.

The gameplay of Eroico is that of a fairly standard sidescrolling action game. The nameless knight’s primary method of attack is a stubby sword that feels outclassed by a toothpick early on. By hitting the attack button, he can wildly swing it forward to mow down anything in front of him. He can even perform a dashing stab on the ground, a downward stab in the air, and a spinning slash in the air that essentially functions as a pogo bounce on enemies. Should the enemy reach far past his blade, he is capable of firing a simple magical bullet towards an enemy, though this does sap him of some MP. Perhaps the most important tools to utilize Eroico’s three lengthy levels are the back dash and the shield: by hitting the appropriate button, the knight can dash backwards quite a bit, avoiding any attacks in the process. By crouching, the knight will block any attacks that would otherwise damage his front.

Make no mistake, that shield will be your best friend by the adventure’s end.

Sadly, I was unable to take a screenshot of the shield in action, as I was too busy trying not to die.


Eroico’s difficulty is a strange beast, escalating in some aspects while simultaneously decreasing in others. Early on, the biggest challenge comes from not being a reckless fool that charges straight into enemies, since there are only two checkpoints per stage (one in the middle, one near the end). It doesn’t help that, perhaps to offset how short they would be otherwise, the individual screens in levels are quite long; sometimes to their own detriment. Compounding this are very scarce health pick-ups, making even a tiny mistake fatal when the knight can’t take much abuse. Eroico is generally fair with its difficulty, punishing the reckless and rewarding the patient, but it has its share of cheap moments on occasion. As they say, you never forget your first bed of spikes after a screen transition.

Leveling out the playing field against the terrifying vixens are a small set of goodies strewn throughout the stages. By defeating the game’s numerous monster girls, they will yield blue glitter upon defeat. By collecting 25 grams of an arts-and-crafts project and seeking out one of two golden pedestals nestled in the game’s stages, the hero can empower the range of his sword or his magic to better handle threats such as harpies, catgirls, dragon girls, slime girls, and so on. Rounding out the list of goodies to grab are heart pieces, four of which make a whole heart container. Clearly, the little hero must be a Hyrulean knight in training.

Speaking of enemies, the monsters in Eroico are more varied than a box of assorted fruit snacks. Catgirls meander (meow-nder?) around until they notice you, vampires aggressively try to slash at you before lunging at your neck, and harpies channel the almighty asshole that is the red arremer. Alone, enemies are a simple endeavor when playing patiently, but when combined with the game’s platforming elements or even other enemies, you’re bound to run into that one spot sooner or later. Compared to the challenges the stages have to offer, facing the bosses is easier than the local high school slut. In a total inversion of what you would expect, the bosses only become easier as the game progresses.

Hey, Shantae had to pay the bills somehow after Risky’s Revenge.


From a visual standpoint, it’s clear Kyrieru has improved quite a bit since his last work. The sprites are much larger here than they were in his previous game, making their animations feel more natural than the tinier sprites of yesteryear. The trade-off for larger sprites is a slightly smaller screen space to work with, but given how Eroico doesn’t move at Mach 10, it’s a fair trade-off in my book. All the sprites are robustly colored, animated, and are a joy to ogle whether they’re running, attacking, or procreating. The levels themselves naturally aren’t as detailed as the character or enemy sprites, but the game overall is visually arresting from start to finish, if simplistic in its actual character designs.

While the sprites are an oasis awaiting those parched for pixel art, the audio isn’t anything spectacular. Eroico’s score is certainly characterful and memorable (particularly if you keep dying), aiming for a tone that oozes “adventure”, but the only song that really stood out was the second level theme. Everything else in terms of audio is par for the course, with sound effects that give slaying cute girls that extra “pop” it needs to make you feel good about ridding the world of these heathens.

Let’s be real here: Checkpoint-chan is the best girl.


Of course, what would a game with “Ero” in its title be with no erotic elements to speak of? Upon starting the game, Eroico presents the player with a very curious choice: whether they would like to enable or disable adult content. Surprisingly, there are very, very minor adjustments made to the gameplay depending on which option you select. Opting to enable adult content will include dizzy states into the gameplay after being hit by some attacks, whereupon the knight will be mounted by the otherworldly vixens if he doesn’t regain his footing fast enough. This mode also enables the use of the “?????” command, which lets the player go into this dizzy state at will, effectively letting keen players use this state for invincibility frames if they’re too inept to dodge properly. Disabling adult content not only lets you stream the game on streaming websites without fear of the banhammer, but removes the dizzy state altogether, making Eroico more of a standard game in the process.

The actual sexual content in Eroico is rife with rape, though it might disappoint some to learn it’s not the knight doing the raping. Enemies will mount themselves on the hero when he’s dizzy, forcing a “tug of war” to commence. If you’re sensible and voluntarily lose this tug of war, your reward is watching the hero unleash his white-hot liquid chivalry inside the wild sluts. Being slain in battle completely will display a “press start” prompt that really wants you to look at the static, default game over screen. Wait just a bit longer for a monster girl to mount the hero after his health is depleted, however, and the game over screen will now display a CG that reflects the enemy currently mounting you.

Thankfully, Kyrieru has improved quite a bit since his previous work, resulting in CGs for every enemy in the game, a separate mode that lets you unlock the CGs straight away if you’re lazy, and most importantly, his artwork is good now. His skills with digital artistry won’t blow any heads off with its quality, but the characters presented in Eroico’s CGs are actually anatomically correct and generally look much less angular than some of the illustrations did in Kyrieru’s last game.

The anatomy here is totally fine. Just don’t look at the hero’s right leg.


In fact, Eroico includes an actual options screen this time around, allowing the player to tweak the sounds and resolution as they wish. There’s even support for gamepads and keyboard rebinding, which is definitely a plus in my book.

I wish I was able to say the same for Eroico’s actual performance because I’ve had an easier time convincing that one hooker to stop stalking me than I did getting this game to work. Perhaps my rig is simply cursed and cannot run Game Maker games properly due to my house being built atop an ancient Native American burial ground. Regardless of whatever the neighborhood rumors claim, Eroico displays several issues, such as continuing to read your keyboard inputs when the game is minimized, displaying the game over CGs outside my monitor’s display when in windowed mode, and cutting the framerate to 10fps whenever I tried to use a controller with the game. There were also some quirky in-game bugs as well, though they weren’t nearly as intrusive. These ranged from enemies not quite reacting to the dizzy state or somehow retaining my health upgrades from save slot 1 when I started a new game in slot 2. This is to say nothing of the fact that, as with Kurovadis, I initially couldn’t run Eroico properly due to issues with vJoy. It’s incredibly glaring how, even after getting the game to work, it still feels like the game is dependent upon paper clips and rubber bands to function correctly.

Perhaps that these technical issues are purely based on an obscure, very specific issue with my PC that I have yet to discover. With any luck, you should be able to run the game just fine. Should you run into the same problems I did, please leave a comment and I will personally mail you the finest whiskey to drown your sorrows in.

Wait, his balls are facing the screen but his body is facing the other way so how does this even


Eroico is a game that prides itself on its gameplay far more than it does on sexual content. Make no mistake, there is more emphasis on sex here than there was in Kyrieru’s previous game, but the two elements that comprise your standard H-game (gameplay and porn) are still segregated. No other part of the game highlights this better than the option to play without the sexual content enabled at all. Eroico stands firmly on its own legs as a brisk, 2D action game you could tear through while waiting for HD JAV torrents to finish. While it may not be anything special compared to other more conventional 2D action games, it’s certainly a cut above your average porn game, dishing out the game first and foremost. Now, if only Kyrieru made a game where you could forcibly rape enemies instead of having to game over for the sex scenes. That would be a real treat.

A demo of Eroico, along with the option to purchase the full game, can be found on Kyrieru’s official blog . If you’ve got some cash to spare and feel like supporting the guy, he also has a Patreon.

Pros

  • Simple, yet effective gameplay
  • Fairly challenging levels
  • Lovely presentation

Cons

  • Spotty technical issues
  • Somewhat inconsistent difficulty
  • Gameplay
  • Story
  • Sound
  • Art and Graphics
  • Replay Value

LewdFactor

Eroico is a 2D sidescroller that features over a dozen monster girls to be raped by. While the girls are varied in scope and composition, the actual sex is a bit plain.

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