All Chest Sizes Matter


All things considered, romance just isn’t my thing.

I mean, there’s nothing outwardly wrong with lovey-doveyness, treating your girl like an equal, and overall having an equitable relationship with – who am I kidding? That shit makes me sick. There are only a few “vanilla” works I can stand, and even then they usually have some turbo-fucked shit like incest or “rape-but-she-likes-it” shit going on. Let’s not beat around the bush.

Still, though, it is Valentine’s Day, and it would be a crime to let such an important date just pass by without dedicating an article to it. What could I, Aries Buonarroti, bring to the table when it comes to this topic? What is the purest form of love that surpasses the sickeningly shallow ideals of a normalfag relationship? Yuri? Way too tame. Rape? Awesome, but I already wrote about that less than a week ago. Sibling incest? Real nice, but a bit too constricted for a special Valentine’s day topic. So, what could I do? What can give spice to an otherwise shamelessly boring normal relationship?

Well, the girl being batshit crazy really does help.

Think about it. If we define love as passionate affection, there are no girls more passionate or affectionate than yandere girls. And in this sick society where gender roles are turned upside down, no girls know their place better than yandere girls do. Yes, of course, if you reject them they’ll pursue you relentlessly and chain you up, but that’s only as an emergency measure. If you accept your yandere for who she is, you’ll find no lover more docile, no one more willing to follow your commands and do whatever to please you, and to kill every filthy whore that tries to get between you! For myself, an ideal relationship is one where the girl treats me like a deity and lets me stick it up her wherever on command, so if you think about it, yandere girls are pretty much the ideal women.

In that spirit, and of course out of the infinite mercy of my little black heart, I set out to find and deliver to you my beloved-if-unwashed masses a truly patrician showcase of the very best in yandere doujin to keep you entertained both today and beyond. Enjoy this Valentine’s Day, friends, and do remember that “dear God please stop you’re hurting me,” is just whore-speak for “I love you, fuck me harder!”


After-School Marriage

By INU.

Plot

A young teacher is tasked with tutoring Akagi, his hot high school girl student. After months of torture at observing her slutty ways, he is finally seduced by her body and fucks her, beginning what he thinks is but a temporary, carnal relationship. Unbeknownst to him, though, Akagi has fallen in a deep, obsessive love with him, and she will do anything to keep him at her side.

So apparently it’s his fault that she’s a total slut.

Art

While I recognized the art style immediately after looking at it, I didn’t actually know INU as an artist, so to speak. By that, what I’m trying to say is that his ridiculously common name makes it ridiculously hard to find his stuff without knowing a title. Type “inu” into a search bar and you’ll get a million results from a bunch of different people. I couldn’t even find his pixiv page, to be honest. Still, whoever he is, the man is a genius. His girls are plump and soft, and he nails their yandere expressions perfectly. This particular work is actually part of a much larger, 200+ page tankobon titled “~The Trembling Lip~”, so check that out if you liked this.

With a face like that, how could you not fall in love with her?


Layers of White

By Senkaku Memorial.

Plot

As a young boy, our protagonist wanders into his parents’ backyard shed and comes face to face with a vision so horrifying it scars him forever. He manages to flee, but what he sees haunts him all the way to adulthood – so much so that he decides to return ten years later, determined to uncover the mystery hiding in the shed. What he finds is a smoking hot yandere moth girl who really, really wants his dick.

Let’s make it clear – if you wouldn’t have sex with this woman, you are gay and should feel bad.

Art

While I’ve never objected at all to monster girls who just look like girls in cosplay (since girls are pretty much amazing either way, plastic horns or no), there’s something to be said for more alien monster girls. I don’t mean Lovecraftian abominations or anything, but there is a certain alien beauty to impressive white moth wings and pitch black eyes paired with a rocking pair of tits.

Though you have to admit, cleaning up all that moth dust after the sex must be a bitch.


Paved with Good Intentions

By ganmarei.

Plot

A young man gathers up the courage to confess to his high school sweetheart, only to find that she is a non-virgin turbo slut who is also an edgemaster who thinks love is nothing but an illusion. Enraged at finding that his waifu is disgusting used goods, our protagonist decides to punish her and teach her what love is by careful application of anal rape and strangulation. Fortunately, she’s batshit crazy enough that she loves it – the whore.

Oh, so now you’re a virgin, are you, princess?

Art

The art in this is fantastic all-around. The proportions are a bit exaggerated, which isn’t all that much to my taste, but those expressions! Also, I really, really like the slight pseudo-goth thing going on with the girl. There’s really something to be said for smug, edgy girls getting absolutely destroyed and put in their place by cock.

She’s the kind of whore that enjoys getting wrecked, though.


Scarlet Heart Paradise

By nishi.

Plot

Mayu is literally the best girl and dindu nuffin, everything in this doujin is COMPLETELY justified and she did nothing wrong. All the other iM@s girls are whores compared to Mayu. With that out of the way, the actual plot: Mayu is secretly a turbo slut who secretly craves nothing more than to give up her virginity on the altar of P-san’s cock. To this end, she kidnaps him and it turns out he’s perfectly willing to bone her after some prodding, so one wonders what was the point of making such a fuss?

Oh, yeah, the complete and total insanity. That explains it. Still best girl, though.

Art

Nishi is absolutely amazing. I’d put him right up there with Fatalpulse and ShindoL as being among the very best of the best in hentai doujin. His mastery of anatomy, composition, expressions, etc. is just top fucking notch, and he absolutely nails the way Mayu is both a complete lunatic and scorching hot. He’s completely amazing, and if you haven’t read all his Chinese comics, iM@s or not, I implore you to rectify that horrible mistake in your life right now.

Somebody give this man a medal.


There you have it, a selection of some of the finest yandere doujinshi in my collection, plus the privilege of being introduced to Nishi if you didn’t know him already. (Can you tell I like the guy’s art?) Enjoy your Valentine’s Day, and if your girlfriend’s a crazy bitch, remember to do your best to keep her locked up and away from other women!

Also, be certain to tune in next week for more delicious doujin content from yours truly!

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